He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.
--Sir Winston Churchill
There's no present. There's only the immediate future and the recent past.
--George Carlin
I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death.
--George Carlin
Quotation, n: The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.
--Ambrose Bierce
The worst solitude is to be destitute of sincere friendship.
--Sir Francis Bacon
A wise man will make more opportunities than he finds.
--Sir Francis Bacon
Money is like a sixth sense without which you cannot make a complete use of the other five.
--W. Somerset Maugham
It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones slept better... while the bad ones seemed to enjoy the waking hours much more.
--Woody Allen
Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy.
--Groucho Marx
I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it.
--Groucho Marx
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